The New Fall Fashion Line.
All the fasionable Democratic candidates this fall will be wearing the latest bracelet from the "Some Guy With a Blog" line of accessories, "WWSD?"
A designer with a conscience, some guy with a blog wants to help the candidates retain their political moorings by carrying with them a constant reminder to ask, "What Would Shrum Do?" Bob Shrum is the uber-strategist who manages to attach himself, lamprey-like, to every Democratic candidate in a significant election, and lose all of them. Shrum's hobbies include watering down the candidate's messages, generally defanging them, having them imitate moderate Republicans, and collecting large fees. By wearing a reminder on their wrist to ask themselves, "What -would- Bob Shrum do?" successful candidates can easily keep their political compass, and their jobs, by immediately doing the exact opposite thing.
And if anyone wants to help make some of these things for real, I'd actually send them out.
4 Comments:
I would actually hire Shrum himself for exactly this purpose.
Plus it would totally make him crazy, which would warm my cold little liberal heart.
By Eli, at 12:08 AM
Shrum's ego is so huge that he would probably enjoy having this line of wrist bands.
"Senator, I notice that you have a wristband like Lance Armstrong's Live Strong band or Madonna's red Kaballa band, what does your leather W.W.S.D wristband mean?"
"Well I'm glad you asked that, Adam, that's a good question. You see, one of the things that I've learned is that sometimes I speak straight from my gut and upset the "Experts" so whenever I'm tempted to pull back from the fire in my belly I look at that wrist band and think, "What would Shrum Do?" That's Bob Shrum, the guy behind all the recent losses of Democratic candidates. Then when I know what he would do, I just do the OPPOSITE!
So for example, Shrum probably would advise me to not engage you in this very question. "Too inside baseball" he would say, "Might upset the moderates" he would advise.
"Screw that! I'm going to win and I'm not going to take advice from the "professionals" who say
"We have to act like republicans-lite to win."
The Republican president is massively unpopular, the VP who is really the decider is in the TEENS in approval rating, the republicans are running away from Bush and Cheney every chance they get. Why in the HELL would I want to be MORE like THEM? That's crazy talk!
So THAT my good friends in the media is what W.W.S.D. bracelet is about. Any more questions about how we are going to get out of Iraq or how I plan to fix our broken energy policy?"
By spocko, at 2:48 PM
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